Realistic Expectations
I don’t know who needs to read this, but you’re not unhappy in your relationship because you’re not with your person, you are unhappy in your relationship because your expectations are unrealistic. “Well, Ashlee, what do you mean?”
You have a good man that gets up every day and goes to work and works hard for you, comes home and helps you take care of the kids. You know, them two kids that you came with, your package deal. That man is loving on you, caring for you, forcing you into your soft girl era. You have a man who is supporting your dreams. That man is telling you you’re beautiful even on the days that you don’t feel beautiful. And because he’s not 6ft with a six-pack making six figures, you think you can do better?
Sir, you’re telling yourself that you’re not really happy with this woman although she prays for you. She speaks life into you. She cooks for you. You’re eating better, you’re feeling better, you know, you’re down 15 pounds. She is the one that has introduced you to a new way of life. This woman took you back to church. She helped you to see that them homeboys wasn’t really your homeboys, they was really hating. And now, you got a new group of friends that elevate you because she encouraged you to get outside of your bubble. She loves your mama, she loves your kids. Your children’s mother has been behaving beacause this good woman has helped create balance and peace. This woman has truly blessed you.
Let’s be honest
However, because her body isn’t shaped the way you prefer you believe that you have better options out there. This woman is level headed, full of maturity. She doesn’t add that little bit of toxicity that you are attracted to at times, so you think you can do better. Because she doesn’t have that toxicity or that body, you have convinced yourself that that’s not your wife. Ma’am, you think that if you get back out here, you are not going to have the same dating options today that you had 5 years ago, 10 years ago. You are lying to yourself!
If you take time to realize those expectations are not realistic you will see how incredible your life actually is. Before you make an irrational decision and end up like Mike from the movie ‘Why did I get married’ please take account of what you have in your partner. You’re may end up losing your 80% in pursuit to go get 20% that you think you are missing.
All I’m saying is, before you go and do something that you can not undo, take a second and step back. I suggest that you look and evaluate how great your life is, and be grateful that you have a man or woman that’s willing to love you with all of your flaws! Instead of thinking you can do better than that person not realizing that’s going to be the best you’ll ever get.